Date : Sunday, February 17, 2008
Time : 8:58 PM

Title :

-continued from part 1-

The hospital is warm and nice...I trot briskly down the corridor. I've been coming here for so long now it doesn't feel strange anymore. It's like a second home.
Sister Charlie is on duty. " Any change today?" I asked.
" Just the same."
She leads the way briskly to the room where Michele lies, opens the door and walks cheerfully up to the bed.
" Good colour today. Rosy cheeks! Nice and healthy," she says.
It's true. Her cheeks are a bright, pretty red, as if she's been out for a walk.
"Well, I'll leave you to it. Cup of tea? Yes? I'll get one sent in. Good luck. Goodbye, Michele," says Sister Charlie.

She always says goodbye to Michele like that. It's good manners. For a long time the doctors told us it was possible that Michele could hear every word. I don't think anyone believes that any more- not even me . But we have to be careful, just in case.

I put the Spice Girls on the CD player. I'm teasing, really. Michele always loved to be teased, it used to make her shriek. If she were here now she'd shriek like a kettle and say, " No mum, not them, they're for babies, I never listen to them any more, you know that!"

Yes, but you used to, Michele. Do you remember? You used to know every song backwards. You and Jack and Jill used to do the dance routines. It was only three years ago, and already you think you were a baby then.
I hold up the CD cover.
" Remember?" I ask her.
Michele lies with her head pushed a little back into the pillow, her eyes half open,her mouth ajar like a door. Tubes go into her mouth and up her nose. She never even flinches.

" Remember??" I ask again. I hold her hand. " Give a little squeeze if you can hear me," I say. I wait. Maybe it'll take a long time for the muscles to move. She has to find them again. The doctors have said that if she ever comes back to us, it will start in a tiny way, so little you might almost not notice it. So I wait. I close my eyes. I try to feel the slightest, tiny pressure on my fingers, but there's never any response.

" Remember?" I beg. " Please....Michele. Can you hear me?" Nothing. I bend and kiss her.
I would give everything I have for her to kiss me back.
I sit waiting for my tea, stroking her face,her arm, her hands.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Something happened today. I had a memory. I never had one of those before.
It began with the woman, the sad one who comes in everyday to stare at her reflection in my eyes.
" Michele, Michele, can you hear me? Michele, Michele....."
What do you want? Why can't you leave me alone? I don't know who this Michele is- why does she keep calling me by her name? Perhaps she's teasing me. If I could, I'd block her out altogether. But it's nice to feel her warm breath on my face. She touches me with her cold hand. Sometimes she remembers to warm her hands on her breath before she touches mu cheek. Then one time, she put her head close to mine so our cheeks were touching, and she lay like that, gently against me, for so long that I think I feel asleep, and that's when I had my memory.

This is my memory...I was lost. I can't remember how I got lost, I think I'd just wandered too far. I remember tall houses...I remember the road, which was dark and speckled with little white and brown stones, and I had no idea how to get home.............

-to be continued-